This Year (2010)

This yr has been the worst yr of my life. So much death n tragedy... So many friends and family lost...Skool has been kicking my ass literally...But through it all i come out with u guys in the end...You guys have laughed with at me or about me, listened 2 me rant and rave about many a things...You guys have been my therapy and for that i thank each n everyone of ya...Without ya i would have surely gone crazy (ya no it run in my family lol...no for real though it does)...So from the bottom of heart (that sounds bad don't it lol...scratch that) from my heart lol thank u :-) !!! Happy New Year!!

My Dream that can neva be...

I woke up this morning crying becuz of a dream i had. Not becuz it was scary but becuz it will neva come true...I thought if i told u guys i would stop crying n pull myself 2gether but its not working becuz i'm crying while i'm writing this...My dream was about me making plans with my godson's mother about his future... I remember him as a baby becuz thats wat he was the last time i saw him. I was telling her I'm in college now working so I'll be able to take care of him. I'm gonna start the paper work next yr so he can come 2 America n be with me. I was gonna send her a laptop so they could video chat its better than talking on the phone. I told her don't worry I love u, I'm gonna take care of you n him...Ya won't need for nothing. In the back round i here her telling him see ur nenane loves u so u better be good for her wen u go 2 america. We were both so happy with that plan then i wake up n remember that shes gone n he's gone n my plan can neva be becuz they died in the earthquake in haiti...I miss them so much...

Catch up

We had the killer snow storm most of sunday into monday morning... i woke up n couldn't even open the door. I love the snow but i can't even enjoy it becuz i'm sick fml. I got some good presents for xmas wat about u guys?  Did i mention that i been trapped in my house for the past 3 days...Lol not that i wanted to go anywhere in particular but this is just ridiculous...

My crush still hasn't hit me up. At this point i'm ok with it time 2 move on, life goes on. I'm not gonna put my life on hold becuz of this one dude. I only got one life to live and i'm not wasting another day on him... if somebody actually wants me for me then i'm ready to give them a chance...In the words of keri hilson "...my love has a limit..." (I love her songs breaking point and pretty girl rock by the way lol)  and baby mine has jus reached it, so its on to the next one lmao...So thats that ya... leave ya opinion...

So another thing is apparently i have a sign on my head that says all young boys apply here. All these boys looking to get "experience" seem 2 want me...News flash boys i have none so go find ur self a real cougar. Personally I'm not into younger guys but all these high skool kids think i'm the latest trend...I'm 19 guys i jus look 15 it not my fault I'm short n girls today r over developed... I no i said somebody who wants me for me but really god...u got jokes lol...Wat ya think of all this? leave ya opinion

Yaaay it's christmas

Merry christmas ya!!!! Yes i'm excited cuz i do love presents but i also luv 2 give...I'm finally done shopping woooo! I started so late this yr i didn't no if i was gonna make it... I like surpassed my shopping budget by $80 but at least it was all cash no credit for me (unless u count the money i'm gonna borrow from my parents lol ;-) ) Omg guess wat i got my self (yes i do buy myself a present every yr lol... becuz I'm special) I got a giant pajamas the ones wit the feet like the toddlers. I been looking for those everywhere although i'm not that tall could not find one that fit. So anyway I found them 2day a Macy's n i was jumping around like a 5 yr old. I plan 2 rock these babies on New Years eve. I'm going 2 be very warm n comfortable lol... So wat ru guys doing for the holidays?

I'm done

Finally done wit the semester from hell yaaaaaay. I did pretty good for the most part. Now i can sit beck and relax for a few weeks :-). I'm still not finished christmas shopping (I no i'm late but i'm broke ppl) lol probably gonna finish that some time this week in between my naps lol. Still don't know my plans for news yrs yet but i'm staying up for sure...wat ru guys up 2 for the holidays?

Guess wat?

I got the job guys yaaaaay...lol just wanted 2 let ya guys know im gonna be making that paper lol jk. Its a really good job cuz i can work there after i graduate and its a really good hospital...Did i mention that the guys r hot lol?  (Yes I am holding out for my crush but i can still browse ;-) lol. He hasn't hit me up by the way...) Just in case u guys were wondering... So wats up with u guys any exciting news?

The worst week ever...

I can't believe u gone...I remember us all playing around in elementary skool...hERE 2DAY GONE 2mrw another one of my fellow classmates gone... R.I.P. we'll see u a again in that skool in the sky...:-(

Life is too short...

I just found out that my former class mate from high skool died this morning.He left behind a young son, girlfriend, family and friends. His life was taken all a too quickly.U realize that life is not a game and u can't live it that way. R.I.P  and my prayers go out to his family I hope he's smiling down on ya from heaven...

Pray for me ya...

I have two finals 2mrw. The first one is at 8am and its a hundred fucking questions (WTF). Idk if i can pass this i got get a 94  just to pass this class. Everybody "seems" to have faith in me except me. Nursing really kills ur confidence... I was always the smart girl n now i jus feel plain stupid n like im jus a plain girl. My looks are ok but my smartness is wat i had going for me u no...Theres like nothing left except maybe my hair...The other is in the night time which isnt bad im gonna go home an go to sleep in btw. Its an essay about twilight so that isn't bad at all. How r ya guys finals? Am I the only one who's being screwed over by college?

Anthem

My new anthem is firework by katy perry... I think it speaks to a lot teens n plan ppl in general. Truly inspiring words written from someone who is supposedly a "bitch" not my words... But it really touches my heart and it gives me hope for tomorrow. It just wat shy ppl need to come out of their shells (including me). Its about new beginnings and acceptance i'm all for it lol. Best line in the whole song "...Maybe the reason y all the doors r closed, so u could open one that leads u to the perfect road..." if that doesn't hit u idk wat will. Tell me wat u think...

Video chats

I just got an oovoo n a skype (its my laptops fault lol) i gotta admit it was fun the one and only time i used it. I talked 2 one of my bffs who i haven't seen in a while. Its the next best thing to having the person there. I think its like the best new idea since the ipod touch lol. I'm very technology oriented n i'm a total gadget geek, wat about u guys?

A week

I decided to leave dude a message. I left my name and number and i give him a week 2 call back. By this time next week if he hasn't called i'll take it as a sign that it's time to move on. I'll know that i did everything in my power to make it happen. You can't force something thats not there. If he does call back thats still not a definite but I cross that bridge if and when i get to it. I let you guys no how it works out...

Drained mentally and physically

Idk wat it is about this semester or these past like 3 or 4 months but i can't get a break... i feel like i'm being drained like a sponge but its life getting sucked out of me not water. I miss simpler times, as a matter of fact i miss the summer all i did was read, watch tv, go to the library and work. Life was simple now idk wat 2 expect or wats expected of me. I'm so tired not being enough or not giving enough...

Do i leave a message...

So yesterday i finally got the guts to call this dude (this dude being my crush) and it either rings or goes to voicemail. One of my friends is like maybe u should leave a message cuz most ppl won't pick up a number they don't know. I'm bad at leaving messages n plus how do i no that he'll get it... So here's my new problem: Do I leave a message or jus stop calling?

Crasy ass dog

Tell me y im driving minding my on business bumping to the radio...When this big ass police looking dog scared the living shit out of me. It came up right next to my car running side by side trying to get in front of my car. Mind u that i was going that fast but i hit the breaks mad quick...I luv dogs if i would have hit it, that would have broke my heart i don't think i would be able 2 drive any more. I'm all about caring for animals and ppl this is y im studying nursing lol. What crazy ass dogs live in ur neighborhood? I wanna hear about it lol.

My long time Crush...Can u solve my dilemma?

So if u read my my earlier ( College life at home: My BFF & College life at home: To no one in particular...) posts then u no that my crush was mentioned but not known and i said that i would explain... Ok I'm the kind of girl that when i like i'm really into u and only u. You have and hold my full attention. I think other guys r cute but my heart isn't really in it. So my crush is from way back in elementary skool. I had a crush on him since the 4th grade. The first time i saw him, he was rounding up his lil brothers and sisters (he has alot of them lol) to go home after skool. He was being all nice and sweet with them i jus looked at him and thought "damn, he is so cute and he would make a really great dad..." Y am i thinking about having kids at 9 yrs old is beyond me lol. Then i met him in the fifth grade (that was a good yr) n he was as nice i thought he would be. Basically i liked him he like me and we just never got together. One of my best friends at the time let it slip that i had gone thru puberty. He asked me if i wanted to have his babies which had me speechless for a moment but then i cursed him out.I look back on that and still laugh, lmao. He asked me 2 my fifth grade prom (the only guy to ever ask me) which was so sweet but i didn't even go to prom (i really regret not going). When we had our graduation rehearsals he got jealous of the guy i was walking with (if that doesn't make u go awww then nothing will lol). After our fifth grade graduation we took pictures n he gave me a kiss on the cheek. I was totally shocked cuz my dad was right there... I had 2 act disgusted 2 keep up appearances lol but it was a good surprise. He  was soooo sweet.


By this point we talk on the phone almost daily n his mom is tired of me calling his house lol but she's nice about it. We went 2 the same middle skool but hardly saw each other in skool but when i did see him it was good times. We would hang after skool in front of our old skool while picking up younger siblings. This is the time we started hugging evytime we saw each other lol. Then around 7th grade he took some summer classes so he could go back to his rightful grade. He was a yr older then me n got either left back or they messed up his papers wen he came to the U.S. Anyway i only saw him after skool senior yr of middle skool cuz he was already in his first yr of high skool. Then i didn't see him or his siblings for like a straight month. When i asked him about it, he didn't answer so i dropped it. (Come to find out yrs l8a that his dad left his mom for another women. They got into an argument he ends up killing her (the girlfriend not the wife). I'm really mad that he didn't tell me i thought that we were close at the time but i digress.) So anyway back to the story, then after i graduate n go to high skool i gotta take the bus back to my sisters skool pick them up and go home. By this time i get there he's always already gone. So i missed seeing him that was our hang time. So one day i get off the bus to walk to the skool and i hear someone calling me. I look around and its him he sat there and waited for me. I was so surprised so we started talking or watever. Then he goes "u not gonna give me my hug?" I'm like i thought i was the only one who liked us hugging but apparently i was wrong. I wasn't even thinking about that i was jus happy to see him. He had to take the bus but didn't wanna leave so he let the first bus go by but the second bus came right after it so he really had to leave. 


So it basically was like and unsaid tradition for us to hang out after graduations whether it be ours or our siblings its always an interesting experience lol.So during 9th grade i find out that im moving and i finally tell him after my sister n his brother's graduation. I was basically hanging out with him and his whole family. He didn't believe me at first but when i kept repeating it i guess it settled in. I had a regents 2 take that afternoon n evytime i was like i gotta go he was like wait jus 5 more minutes u can take the next bus... It got to the point where i only had 30 mins to get to the skool wen it usually takes me an hour becuz of this boy. I was really weighing the pros and the cons of staying and talking to him rather then taking this test. So when its finally time for me to leave we exchange numbers and i give him a big hug. This is gonna sound really corny but i still have the paper that he wrote his number on and its like 4 almost most five yrs l8a (thats either dedication or creepy u tell me). I haven't seen him since that day tried calling him but his phone got disconnected. Then i find out a couple months l8a that he had moved 2. Ok so i jus found out about wat his dad did n even though its none of my business i'm mad he didnt tell i thought we were close if ur going thru something and ur my friend i wanna do evything i can to help....Anyway get this now my sister is friends with his brother  n jus got into contact with his brother has the number and evything. So do i call him n see wats good or do i let go of the past and move on? So this is the one that i lost that i never really had...So only like my closest friends no the whole story about him n now u do 2... leave ur comment n tell me ur honest opinion cuz i could really use it...

Tyrese

I like totally love this dude his music speaks to me... If a guy said half of the things he wrote about to his girl or a girl that he likes, there is no reason for him to be single I'm jus say lol

Tyrese - What Am I Gonna Do

What's your favorite movie quote?

Oh sweet baby jesus lol (stolen from kelly)

Ask me anything

What YouTube video made you laugh recently?

gay drop it low...lmao them boys r better then any girls!!

Ask me anything

What's the furthest you've ever traveled?

I went to haiti idk how far away that is lol

Ask me anything

If you could go on vacation for the next month with an unlimited budget, where would you go?

i would go all over europe

Ask me anything

Professors that can't teach

Some ppl can either teach or they cant. If u get bad reviews evy yr n nobody nos wat the hell ur talking about, don't u think its time u find a new profession. I mean y put students who bust there butts 4 ur class n pay god nos how much for tuition a yr the heart ache of failing a class wen its obvious that u cant teach... quit while ur not a head. How is it wen u explain something students end up more confused then wen they started. Please don't do us any favors by "teaching" us. No one is benefiting from it... except u but ur a nurse there are plenty of other jobs, cuz teaching is not 4 u... If u didn't no b4 u no now... Idk if u guys have professors like that? If u do leave a comment...

Weird guy

So today i had n hr to kill b4 i had 2 go 2 tutoring so i jus sat down at a table (they have little chill spots wit tables all over campus) like right across from the bathroom n stairs theres also an office right next to it. Basically ppl r always comin n goin all the time. This dude comes n sits like right across from me im like watever its a public place but this dude like stares at me for like 30 minutes. I have on headphones n im reading a book the hair on the back of my neck is like on end. I really thought he was gonna try 2 attack me on the elevator while i was leaving...The creepiest thing ever!!